Leo Baubata over at Zen Habits has 3 Little Tricks to Deal with People Who Offend You. Now, you probably haven’t met anyone who has ever offended you but just in case you do, one of Leo’s 3 tricks just might, well, just might do the trick. It’s worthwhile to read the post, Leo’s writing is, itself, Zen but here’s a quick summary:
1. Get Big – Grow up and get perspective. Basically, think about how whatever is annoying you is really not that important. Realize that your annoyed self is similar to a young child who doesn’t understand that the thing which is bothering him/her is not so important. Then, remember that you’re not a child anymore and that this present annoyance is really not that important.
2. Float Down the Stream – Here, Leo uses the annoyance of rude drivers, maybe you’ve heard of them, as an example of a common annoyance. Instead of getting angry at them, reframe and imagine them as leaves or twigs floating by you as you navigate a stream. Just as twigs or leaves aren’t out to annoy you, other drivers aren’t either. They’re just floating by.
3. Give Them a Mental Hug – people who offend you are usually just angry or scared. So, don’t just worry about your feelings, worry about theirs and give them a mental hug. It’s hard to remain angry at a hugee.
Now, in the unlikely event that you encounter someone who annoys you, consider yourself well armed.